Sacrifice!

My dear people,

Time flies. This week had some crazy hectic moments, but it was so sublime.
This email is going to be a little bitter sweet because it's my last from San Carlos. Transfers snuck up on me and I'm leaving San Carlos, going to Siaton! Right next to Bayawan, so I'm excited to be going back to my birthplace. It's bukid and in the middle of nowhere, as usual- I have missed my caribou friends and the lush rice field views, so expect new scenic pictures. I really can't wait. I've always felt such a special spirit about Siaton- I've imagined myself serving there many times, and now I'll be there. I'll be there with Sis. Joson and I am excited.

Also, I'm going to be a grandma! Sis. Harris is training, so I have an apo (grandchild)

But leaving gets harder and harder. President Dellomes told us that none of us missionaries were allowed to transfer in the sweetest PEC meeting that I've ever been in.

About President- He's an incredible man. An elect of God who searched for truth in every church he could find, until he met some sister missionaries 3 years ago, brought them home, and introduced them to his wife, who said, "Oh, yeah, by the way, I'm Mormon." She came back, he was baptized, they were sealed the next year, and now he's boldly leading San Carlos Branch 2. I'm always grateful for the priesthood examples I see on my mission. This past month, I've really felt like our branch and leaders needed to learn sacrifice. And it wasn't really something I could teach, so I just prayed for it, and tried to be a really good example of sacrificing myself. Then on Sunday, we had a fireside and watched the Restoration film. Half way through the movie, President who's sitting right behind us and our less active YSAs, leans forwards and says, "Their sacrifices were so great!" I just had to smile and thank Heavenly Father and the Holy Ghost. San Carlos is doing so well.

Pres. McCurdy visited our branch! And they managed to get people there on time sort of, and the sacrament was ready, and no one walked around during the sacrament, and Bro. Buen blessed it! So many steps and halos miracles tanan! (It's all a miracle)

He and most of the missionaries in the zone also came to baptism for Eugene. It was great. We ended up with an impromptu musical number, and lots of pictures. It was really sweet. He's a member! And on Sunday, he showed up with a white shirt from a member and prayed in our class for about 10 minutes with gratitude. He's such a funny teenager, with a really sweet sincere desire.

Nanay Remedios is so great. We found her by following up with a contact of her brother who seemed sort of strange but we felt to go back. At first, we thought she was kind of slow, but I'm pretty sure she understands the gospel better than we do. We taught her the Word of Wisdom yesterday and she told us that she drank coffee in the morning, and she doesn't like hot chocolate because it's too sweet but if God says so, then we just have to do it and we have to like Hot Chocolate. She's getting ready for her baptism- She's this 67 year old teddy bear lady, but she knows she's found truth.

So many people, so little time!

The Caballero family was really hard to say goodbye to. Bro. Jun is struggling again with cigarettes and I wish I could be here for when he finally makes it. I had to tell them that I was transferring and Lyn Lyn runs and grabs sunglasses and refuses to talk to me without them- and then her mom started crying too and even the tough boys were affected. One big waterworks over there. Not good. Goodbyes to people that we love are hard. But we can trust in the promises.

San Carlos has expanded my heart and taught me to love. I have so much to work on, and I'm weak everyday, but I love these people!

Plus I love you all! News from Siaton next week- it's another really busy one!

"It doesn't change God. It changes me. -C.S Lewis

Aloha world!

Sis. Tandiman and I enjoy our Hawaii connection, so I've been loving some ALOHA! I love her lots. I promised her dinner at 5-C so I hope you're all excited! She is the kindest ever, and I love our work. My thoughts just naturally flow and come out in Bisaya, English something mixture and it's just grand. We've had a couple of moments this week where we just both look at each other and automatically start walking in the same direction, whether it's to buy some mango flavored caribou milk (highly recommended!) or to find our investigators wherever they may be. 

This week has been full and I'm so grateful! 

Fun events:

On Wednesday, we went and saw monkeys in the world famous Calatrava monkey sanctuary, with the "World's friendliest monkeys!!" I forgot my camera cord now but I promise wonderful pictures next week of Sis. Tueller with a monkey on my lap and shoulder. Elder and Sister Anderson wisely brought peanuts and Elder Anderson was encouraging enough to get me to take the dive. I wasn't quite ready to get the really big ones on me, especially when the big angry armed one tried to steal the entire bag of candy out of the truck. Anyway, life was fun.

On Thursday, we also had an eventful day with a service project- a CSP in the next area over, Calatrava. Basically, we built a foundation for a house by hauling rocks from the riverbed up the ridge to the house. I spent most of my time in the river filling sacks with rocks. We found a crab. I got really muddy. Then I ate salted fish with bananas and drank buko juice (coconut water straight out of the coconut, freshly cut.) I think I'll just leave it there. 

Plus, we can't forget the Baptism!!

It finally happened this week. no more sickness, and Bro. Buen is a clean, free member of the church, with the gift of the Holy Ghost, and Aaronic Priesthood (!). Our members came and supported and I couldn't have been more grateful. We watched him go down into the font (without lights.. we were having a brown out, so we were all sweating in the dark) he got baptized in 3 seconds and there it is! While they changed, we sang hymns- Sis. Tandiman conducted and I sat with LynLyn Caballero. We started singing and she starts crying and immediately I knew what she was thinking- she could see her dad in that same font. I could too. The work isn't done- so much more to do! We sang Nearer  My God to thee- and I was really struck by "Angels to beckon me." I was blessed with so many angels to beckon me- my angel parents, and leaders, and then companions, and investigators, and somehow, Heavenly Father lets me be someone who invites others to go Nearer to their God. 

Bro. Buen got up and simply said, "I feel that God is with me. All my worries are gone. I am grateful." probably in a few more words, but I love the simplicity of the gospel. 

More splits: Sis. Garner and I were working and we passed a house I'd seen before, and there was this light about it. It's in the middle of a dark field and has electricity, so I almost wanted to logically discount that and say, Duh, there's light! But this wasn't something I was seeing, just feeling. So we went to the house, we called out, a wonderful nanay answers the door and needs us. She has lupus and wants to know God. I'm grateful for a Father who knows what I need to learn and where I struggle and teaches me daily.

Let's see, lots more- Eugene is doing so well- we'll have his baptism on Saturday.  Ronico is more converted than ever if that's possible, and he's going to help our lost investigator. Nanay Remedios came to church this week, and I think she got an answer that it's true. She does pray every time we visit for the missionaries from the true church!

Like Bro. Buen, I feel that God is with me this week too. Sometimes, I get so worried about my weaknesses and he just cradles me and tells me that it's going to be okay. And then it is. I'm far from perfect, but I'm trying and that's enough for Him.

I love you all very much! Seek more commandments, obey with all our heart!

Sister Tueller

Father

First, I love you all! I thought of you on Saturday and gathering together in Kahuku chapel and it just made my heart feel light. I was definitely there in spirit. And there we have it! We're members of the Church of Jesus Christ! Send my regards also to our ward family. I was thinking this week about how grateful I am for the ward family who helped to raise me- we have marvelous examples of self less service.

Next, I got letters with the news about Bonnie. The whole family is constantly in my prayers. I had to stop a couple of times this week and ask Father, "Why do hard things happen?" and then I basically just heard words that I say daily to everyone. The gospel is true and I'm so grateful. Because it's true and it's hard, and so I can pray for the people I love.

Miracles abound in this wonderful part of the vineyard. 

I don't think I've told you about Eugene. I should! He's an investigator from quite a while ago, and then he disappeared to who knows where and then we were at Sis. Sally's house one day and he walked by and called us and said, Come teach me again. He's one of the most mature 17 year olds I think I've ever met. He has 12 brothers and sisters so he's kind of figured out his own life, and I think he wasn't on a great path before but he's fantastic now. He's actually been coming to church for the past months and this week we finally worked out things for him to be baptized even though he's under age and so we're having a baptism next week! We actually got to teach his older sister as well in their home. First, you walk to the pier, but then you turn and walk along the sea wall with a view that reminds of waimea beach mixed with the light and clouds of the Kahuku Bike path, the kind that makes you hold your breath just a little longer and then let it all out in a sigh of gratitude. And then you walk past piles of dirt and sand and into the squatters area of little bamboo houses and the first house is Eugene's. We taught there on the floor and I remembered that this is now my normal life, but that you all don't see it daily. I wish you were all there- we wouldn't have fit, but it was so amazing. His older sister basically told us how much Eugene has changed and how he reads the Book of Mormon everyday and teaches his nieces to pray. So that's Eugene.

We sometimes also teach him and his friend Mark Christopher, with my favorite 18 year old member LynLyn in this guard house right on the beach and it's exactly what the Philippines should be. We have that view and then wind, and then we're all reading the Book of Mormon and talking about why we love Father. On Sunday, we were there, and the wind started getting really strong and the clouds gathered in and we finished up and then the clouds starting dumping rain. But we still had to run along the sea wall in the mud from the dirt piles, with one umbrella that was doing nothing because the rain was sideways. LynLyn just started running in the rain but we had to be missionaries. We got to their house and dripped for a while, we got dumped on from a whole in their roof and their family duck tried to bite my foot. So much fun. So so happy. That was the Sunday night baguio. The Elders texted to make sure we were safe- definitely safe, just really wet!

We had dinner with the Andersons. I love senior couples. They are probably the coolest people. Their conversion stories are amazing, and I'm so grateful for their love.

Ronneco passed the sacrament this week. His smile would have made prisons beam.

We taught someone who never goes to church even at the Catholic, Sister Ami. She didn't really get it, but then after laughing hysterically, we got her to pray. She started, "Heavenly Father, thanks for the missionaries.. we ask for blessings " and then it got really quiet, until we hear quiet sobbing and her quiet whisper. It's my first time to talk to him.

I can't describe how sweet that is.

We have a loving Heavenly Father. I prayed to him this week. Not that I don't other weeks, or in every single moment ever, but this week, heaven was really really close from the tile floor. He loves every single one of you, no matter what is going on in your life.

And I love you too!

Sister Tueller

Gaan!

Dearest family,

Updates: Bro. Buen is not yet baptized. Very sad. Too busy to mourn over it too much, and hopefully, this week. He's still really sick, we figured out that likos likos is called shingles in America, so we have some idea. He's always compared himself to Job, and I know this is just the last bit before he finally gets the remission of sins that he's been looking for. But it's really hard to watch. He can't stay awake long enough to read/understand, and teaching him is a struggle. But he'll be restored to his God!

Bro. Jun: is no longer smoke free :( We're working on it. Progress happens daily. I've seen that so clearly in him. He's progressing and then goes back and it hurts to watch him hurt, and I get a little bit of what Heavenly Father must feel watching me when I mess up yet again. But this week, I've gotten out of a little bit of a rut- a watching from the side, loving missionary work, loving the people, but not engaging 110%, that only lasts 2 days kind of rut. And then the scriptures and the spirit and prayer just kicked me out of there and it was all wonderful.

This week was starting to sound really sad as I wrote it, but it was so happy! That's one of those weird paradoxes of my mission- trials just make me happier to be in the service of the Lord. Praying for other people is such a sublime experience. We found great new investigators, the promptings of the Spirit continue in everything, new people came to church. 

Sis. Nanet Edwards: She's probably one of the best characters I've met here- she's a 50 year old school teacher with a voice the size of a house. She stopped coming to church for 5 weeks inexplicably, and wouldn't let us visit her and then finally our branch president texted her and said- we miss her. That's it, and then that same afternoon we visited her and she's back and she loves us. Fulfill our callings!

Ronico got the priesthood, Mark Christopher came to church, more people committed for baptism, our branch president trusts us. Life is good.

I don't think I've ever told you about Shaolin. He's one of our recent converts, 17, best friends with Jayvee, practically part of the Caballero family. He's so funny, and hes progressing so well.When we got here, they wouldn't even sit down and listen or read scriptures and now he wants to go on a mission. We went by the other day and Shaolin wasn't okay at all (the poor boy is in charge of his family and his aging grandma and his mute brother and his drunk father, but he's usually smiling always). We started teaching and I felt super prompted to share a story about "where can I turn for peace?" at a BYUH basketball game. Somehow, every word was related to one of his problems at the moment. He just started crying and talked about it,and then prayed. Afterwards, he looked at us and said, "I feel light."

I've felt that this week. We had some strange lessons and I didn't quite know what was going on, or then things were hard, and then I just prayed. And I felt gaan. Light, not heavy and full of light from God.

I love being a missionary, and following Him!

Read the Book of Mormon, that's our guide here on Earth!

Love you all,
Sister Tueller

Love and Light (I hope you're realizing a pattern here, because I know I am!)

Hello sa inyong tanan!

Here's what we're going to do:

People!

Bro. Buen. He's getting baptized this week! Hopefully. His faith is just being tested right now. He has some strange virus called likos likos that is sort of like chicken pox and so he's not supposed to be immersed in water. That's the one forbidden thing. Grabe! (um, how do I explain this one? Awful, or expression of strong emotion?) We're praying for him and we'd love your prayers as well. He came to his baptismal interview even though he had a fever and felt awful because he told us he wanted to show his repentance to the Lord. I don't even believe the things that come out of his mouth. If it doesn't happen this week, it'll be next week, so he can be baptized with M-boy!

Bro. Jun: That sneaky man! He quit smoking without telling us and has now been smoke free for two weeks which means that we're having a baptism soon! But he needs prayers as well. The Caballeros have been having family prayer and reading scriptures by flash light together and I don't think I've ever seen so much progression as I have here. I can't wait for when they are sealed in the temple, probably right around when Jayvee and LynLyn are getting their endowments to go on their missions.

We went on splits with Sis. Hamson and Sis. Salazar ( a convert of 5 years who is probably the most prepared missionary I've seen, and she just makes me want to be more like Christ!) and we wanted to help them learn to talk to more people- to find! ( they are opening an area out in the bukid and they're going to need faith!) So Sis. Hamson and I went and taught Brother Buen and then we were walking and I needed to talk to this brother in his sikad. He wasn't super interested, but as we're leaving, a college student pulls up on his motor and asks for a Book of Mormon. He says, "I felt so happy when I saw both of you, and I think that's what I need in my life. When can I come to church?"

And then he came! He came late and I was so scared that it would only be a one day miracle but he came in the second hour and was so excited to be in God's church and happy! And Sis. Hamson learned that the elect are waiting.

Brother Sandoval! We finally managed to visit them. He's struggling with some hard questions, but he has faith. It was so rewarding to talk to someone about faith struggles- usually, I just learn from the gift to believe of Filipinos, but to be able to tell someone how to trust God despite of doubts, because I did it... that's why I'm here. As we were leaving, he says, "See you tomorrow (it was Saturday night) Sisters in our God's house"

And I know you weren't expecting this one:

SIS. SALLY!!

The Spirit has been so good this week. We were doing our weekly planning and I'd been thinking about her during my personal study. All of a sudden, I knew we needed to call her. So, even though Sis. Luyong and I had called probably 10 times a day with no response, I called. The phone rings once, and then a voice comes "Day.." (Which is like Daughter, little girl, and you say it dye) Sis. Tandiman looks over to see my huge grin and then it got even better. It was kind of hard to talk because Sis. Sally is in the mountains of Bohol where there is rarely cellphone service. The first thing she said was "We found where the church of Jesus Christ is here, it's not too far, we're (yes, her whole family!) going on Sunday" Her whole story was true. I managed to tell her that I love her and to find the missionaries and to keep in touch before the service was lost again. I know Heavenly Father made that work for us. For Sis Sally and Sis. Luyong and I. She sent us a text- thank you for the inspiration and the light. 

Exactly like Mom told me, the Lord giveth, but he never really taketh away. We sometimes are just learning a different kind of lesson. I don't know if she managed to get to the church, but I know that God loveth his children (1 Ne 11:17)

Like I said, the Spirit has been so good. My goal for this transfer is to "live by every word which proceedeth out of the mouth of God"(D&C 84:44) by following every single prompting and growing in light. And as soon as I made that goal, the promptings were less like, "do good things and you'll be happy." but more like," Go walk on that path, Go follow up with this one specific name, you need to bear your testimony of prophets" I can't even really describe it, but I know it's true.

 We went to the temple. That's the instructions for life. I love the gospel more than I can possibly tell you. Gain light, gain love, gain glory.

Let's see: Happy 4th of July! Enjoy more summer!

Halong mo!

Sister Tueller

After our Temple Session as a part of the Missionary Leadership Council

3 times, 4 if you need it!

Dearest People across the ocean,

San Carlos has been holy ground this week. Not that it’s ever not, but sometimes I forget to look. We had some incredible miracles and hopefully, they come across this lovely keyboard.

Also, I’m praying for all of you in your exciting summer adventures- enjoy!

Updates on people:

Brother Jun didn’t actually quit.. He tried and then got sick and so he went back, but he has faith and he’s going to get a blessing and it’s going to work out. Thank you for the prayers, I know they’re working. One of my favorite moments of this week started last week Sunday. Jayvee, the oldest son in the Caballero family, also a newly returning less active (from his baptism until now) was assigned to give a talk in sacrament meeting. And he stressed about it and planned every night and asked me to write it for him about 50 times but finally made this beautiful talk about Obedience out of Love. He basically threatened his dad if he didn’t come to church because he was so nervous. We got to church on Sunday and JV’s not there yet, but he gets there eventually- late because he was ironing his shirt for the first time in his life (he used to come to church in red skinny jeans.) His family is following in their tricyle and JV sits on the stand and then proceeds to give a great talk through tears about how he loves his dad and that’s why he obeys him even when it’s hard, and then that’s why he wants his dad to obey our Father. So we know Brother Jun can do it.

Brother Buen continues to progress- he asked me about the temple this week and how he can get there. Just the kind of questions we like to hear!

I’ve been focusing again on God’s hand- like Elder Eyring did for years, I look daily for how I saw God’s hand in my life. I'm just going to testify that it's there every single day, probably every single hour, but sometimes I'm a little slow to catch on. Example: We were talking to some little children (they were talking to us) as we went to our appointment with Eugene, and the 13 year old boy invited us to visit their house, and thick Sister Tueller brushes this off as a joke. Next, Eugene isn't there, but we decide to go find someone else. Later, we're looking for a referral from the Elders in the same area, who supposedly lives at the house of Jennifer. We asked people on the street. and they send us to the other street. So even though we know that it's the wrong street, we follow anyway. We're walking down this alley way, and we're suddenly at a house that I know. Back story: we found a less active 3 weeks ago, tried to go back multiple times, and never found him again. 

We ask for Jennifer. And Jennifer is there. Dear Sister Jennifer was baptized at 8 years old along with her brother who we met and stopped going to church at age 11. But her children have been asking her questions about the eternities and she can't answer and really wants to know. She is coming to church this Sunday for the first time in 25 years.

Later, I was looking through my planner and we got a referral for "Jay Alfaro" who just happens to be the husband of Sister Jennifer. We cannot wait to go back to this family because God obviously really wants us there!

And that's happened daily. I can't even describe how blessed we are. We have scriptures that tell us what to do, we can pray and ask and listen and then we have the Spirit every single minute. PLus, this isn't just for missionaries, it's for all of us!!

Also, yesterday, I  taught a Muslim yesterday- like for the first time, I taught someone who didn't believe in Jesus Christ, and basically, missionaries in non christian lands are fantastic. It was incredible To not just help someone understand who Christ really is instead of a fake idea, but to tell them about him for the first time. I know that Christ lives and loves us and I don't just say it but I know it.

We had a successful PMG class for the branch and so much great is happening. Thank you for your prayers- I promise they are felt. I know you'll feel God's love as well if you just look- he'll show you over and over again!

Palangga tamo, until next week

Sister Tueller

Pagpasalig- walay mawala!

News: Transfers- I get to stay here, but Sister Luyong is leaving :( But I'll see her often- she's in Toledo and will get to be the STL for Sis. Cuajao! My new companion is Sister Tandiman from Indonesia! We get to figure out this STL thing together because she's just new, but it's going to be the best!

Happenings of the week: Brother Jun quit smoking! Now for follow up!

Brother Buen continues to teach himself the doctrines of the gospel, we just kind of sit in awe and try to aid the process

We went to Dumaguete- a 5 hour bus ride- for an all island Zone conference to say good bye to President and Sister Schmutz. I want to be a better person, and I already am because of them.

We went up early because Sis. Luyong and I and some other missionaries sang the musical number. We sang I believe in Christ- I loved practicing with people who do believe in him, and enjoying other missionaries and the love of the gospel, and then as I looked out on all of those missionaries, I didn't sing. I literally couldn't sing for two verses because I was so full of joy and belief. But with all my heart, to him I'll sing.

Oh, I haven't told you about Carmel! This is an incredible story that got better this week! On transfer day (6 weeks ago) at the temple, a member overheard that I was going to San Carlos and gave me a referral automatically of a recent convert who'd moved there and gone inactive. In my first week here, we contacted dear Carmel and she came to church that first week. Honestly, she just needed support and the hand of the Lord. When we first visited her, her mom had passed away two weeks earlier and she was so weak. But she's doing so well now! She's missed church for the past couple of weeks but this week, we got to really talk to her. Somehow, we went from "why weren't you at church?" to "Do you think you should go on a mission?" to which she said Yes! But wasn't sure yet.. Don't worry, the Spirit came to the rescue, she read a scripture and looked up with the biggest smile on her face- she's this cute little skeleton of a 23 year old girl and says, Yes really!. So Carmel, despite all odds is going on a mission.

I've been thinking a lot about commitments recently. Of course, we're trying to help Bro. Jun really quit (he seems to be doing well, but we need constant vigilence to conquer Satan!) and help people read the Book of Mormon daily, and commit to come to church even though they've been offended, and that's our whole missionary purpose! But I realized this week how important it is that we personally make commitments to God- of course, there's the big ones that we call covenants, and I can never belittle those. My realization this week though was that we must constantly be making and keeping commitments to God- I have to commit to talk to every person in my path and then do it, or to memorize scriptures and then do it, or any number of things. It's completely changed my view- I was so able to understand how to help others come to Christ through commitments that I forgot that it's a necessary daily process to me. And as I've made commitments to sacrifice more, and then kept those, I can testify of the real blessings that come! The title means Commitment, nothing will be lost, which is something Brother Buen told us this week, in nice contrast to every well meaning Filipino person who says, well, I can't promise, I can't commit because then I might sin if I break it. People, the whole point is that we commit so that we don't sin!

But I love the word Pagpasalig, because it means cause to trust. Brother Jun is saying, Sister Tueller, Sister Luyong, family, Heavenly Father, trust me now because I'm going to stop really this time. I'm saying, Heavenly Father, trust me with more of thy knowledge because I'm going to be better about recording revelation. And trust is something I understand. My trust in God got me on a mission- the year before my mission, I learned lots of things, but they all came down to "TRUST in GOD!" Every time I read the scriptures, that's what I got, and now I'm so grateful to understand that I cause him to trust me as I do his will.

I'm sure so much more happened- I bore testimony in the face of real adversity, we saw the world really clearly in a poor struggling Brother Jad, we had a dinner appointment (!), our recently returned 17 year old LA used his priesthood for the first time in his life to bless the sacrament, we had safe travels, we were leaders, much more- but that's  the week summary.

You're constantly in my prayers,

Palangga tamo,
Sister Tueller