Nakamata jud ko nga "bitaw no?"

People of my heart,

I love you dearly. I love the comfort that I can pray for you and know that you're all happy and doing well. So keep going! Is Laie different after being world travelers? What's the same? Are you back to normal life by now?

I don't even really know where to start this week. In San Carlos, we work really hard and we have lots of miracles. This is incredible. I honestly come home at night exhausted but invigorated- it's sort of a hard emotion to describe but that's it. Having faith to move mountains, or to talk to the next person, or extend a commitment by the spirit takes real energy, and we do it. Sis. Luyong looked at me last night and said, "If we're not tired, then we need to repent. Good thing we are!" So true.

Sis. Luyong. She's the best. I love teaching with her- she looks people in the eye and tells them the truth and then they nod. When we talk to people on the street, they all stop talking and just listen because she's so powerful and kind. And she has faith to the moon and back.  Her new hobby is learning obscure English phrases and using them whenever she can- like I'm happier than a fox in a chicken coop! or Let's blow this popsicle stand! Any suggestions would be appreciated to add to our repertoire. Here she is in a picture with President!

Also, I've been feeling the weight of responsibility. Not in a bad way like it's too hard, just in the way that Elder Bednar talked about "the load" Somehow, the Lord has trusted 19 year old (almost 20!) Sister Tueller with the teaching of so many of his precious children, plus strengthening the church and then other sisters and their areas.. But it's made me a better missionary this week because like Nephi, "I know in whom I have trusted!" The Lord's also trusting us more- we have much more complicated situations than I ever thought I'd deal with when I started my mission, but kaya nako gihapon! we can do it!

Yesterday, I did my first set of exhanges with Sis. Loquias from Mindanao and Sis. Chong Gum from the Marshall island (Mom, her aunt is Julita who was our neighbor. Small world, or just the love of God!) Sis. Loquias and I got to work in our area and we had a great time. Lots of our appointments fell through but we found the people who were ready any way. Like Ben Buhat! Yesterday was our 3rd lesson with him in the past week. He was a contact who seemed to have no potential but I started talking to him again and then he invites us to sit down and teach him. He's a 60 year old retired teacher who's searched for truth since 2003. He met with the missionaries once in 1976 and didn't say a word to them, a friend just forced him to do it. But when we started sharing about Joseph Smith, he tells us the whole story- he's remembered this since then. And then he himself told us that if he remembered it for so many years, it has to be true. He's coming to church this Sunday and we're working on committing him for a specific date for his baptism, but the Lord is good! Sis. Loquias did a great job teaching him, and I really enjoyed the whole experience.

Sally and Lisa! They've read almost all of 1st nephi this week and we just barely gave them the book, but they didn't have the courage to come to church because both were recent converts to other churches. I promise more updates when I know what's actually going on with them- hopefullly tonight. But Sally had a dream and knows its true, so they need to do it!

My favorite part was probably at the end when we got to talk about what they'd learned and questions etc. The title is from Sis. Loquias which basically means, when you all said things, I really woke up to the absolute truth of things on a higher level. I'm so lucky to get to do that- the Spirit is the best thing in the whole universe. And we got to hear their sweet testimonies- I love being a missionary!

Ronico managed to come to church again, and we talked to his father who said that actually, maybe it's okay if he goes to church. I don't think I've ever prayed harder than in the moment- thanks for combining yours with ours!

Our Zone motto is now Walk on Water- and I honestly have been feeling the Lord help us. My favorite part of Luke's wonderful account of Peter walking on water used to be that even Peter doubted and the Lord pulls him up and helps him. But here's my new favorite- Peter walked on water!! We focus on the fact that he faltered but he did it! The Lord called him and he walked on water- the mere mortal Peter did it and we can too. And then when it's a little too much for us alone, he walks with us.

I love the promises of eternity to us- And it all depends on here. Wear out our lives in bringing the hidden things to light (D&C 123: 13) that's all he asks and then he does the rest. Keep being the beacons of light to others!

Love gani,

Sister Tueller

Happy Mother's Day!

Dear ones,

First, it was so fun to see your faces back in our home and talk to you. The promise that we get to be together forever is the best! Enjoy Laie, I'm sure it's missed you. Mama, I love you more than I probably understand. I'm so grateful to see how I'm becoming like you, because if I can be like you in even a small way, I'd be happy. To  everyone else, I love hearing about your lives and successes and you inspire me. That is all.

Second, I am ridiculously happy. This week has been one of the most jam packed weeks of my mission, and I don't expect this to change too much, but I am so so happy. (I completely understand that this does not sound like old Josie.  But it's true, because I'm Sister Tueller!)

First, I said good bye to Balamban. The gift of charity is great, but it's hard when we have to pull ourselves away from these people. But they'll be fine. On Wednesday night, the YSA organized an FHE for their less active friends all by themselves and invited us to give the lesson and then brought everyone and their non member friends and it was at the house of our Less actives' , but the DumDums are actually active now. It was this wonderful culmination of our efforts to get members involved in the work, and all our work and then to see them stand and bear their own testimonies... I love this work!

Then, it's been a week of meetings: STL meeting, and then an Area coordination meeting, and then a branch council meeting and then district meeting and then Missionary Leader council and now I'm meeting with you all! But I have learned so much. MLC was incredible. Pres. Schmutz is filled with the spirit and we all just want to be better because we've been around him and Sis. Schmutz. One of the coolest part was looking at my peers, and my examples in the mission and seeing how much we've grown. Missionaries are a special group. One thought from the meeting: there are two kinds of faith. First, the kind that helps us endure and keep going and trusting. That's a stepping stone to the second: creative, active faith that not only allows miracles, but creates them, and pleads them down from heaven. That's where we're going!

Plus, we got to go to the temple! I love the house of God. Eternity is real. I just looked around at all these people who I've come to love so much- and I was so glad that we had made it there. For one day, we made it! And tomorrow, we have to be worthy and do everything again. But we can make it!

And I am in San Carlos! Everything about San Carlos feels like I'm meant to be here. I don't quite know how to explain that except that a lot of light and tropical green life  is surrounding me, probably more fully in a spiritual sense, but also in a very real gorgeous sense. Sis. Luyong is the best. She says everything like she means it, and she's so cute and sincere, and everyone wants to listen to her.

As for others, the people are wonderful. One story- we have a great recent convert- he's probably the most converted 18 year old that I've ever met. Ronico sells ice cream everyday from a bike to support his family because his father drinks all the time. And the gospel of Jesus Christ was exactly the light they needed.  And he's being fellowshipped by a wonderful member family, the Baltasars. But on Saturday night, he had a huge problem- his father has forbidden him to go to church anymore. We had to work it out, and then a miracle happened- he showed up on Sunday!

And then on Monday, we stopped by before leaving to Cebu and taught Ronico and his half deaf mother who's read the book of mormon 3 times, but is scared of being baptized. Ronico was scared, but just needed encouragement. He needed someone to tell him that he can do it and I'm so grateful that I get to do it. We asked if he'd read, and he says "Sisters, I'm not going to stop reading the Book of Mormon until the day I die, and not even then." That's what we need. We have no idea how this hard situation is going to work out, and I'd love prayers for Ronico, but I know it'll work out. We'll make it in the end. It's not going to be easy. But it's possible through Jesus Christ!

We found amazing new investigators, stories to follow, 

I love you all!

Sister TUeller

Drink of His Cup

Mga gihigugma nako,

Family: How is Laie? Mao ra gihapon- same as always?

First news: Transfer calls came and went and I've been called! I have to leave this Balamban part of my heart, but I'm going on to different things. I'm going to San Carlos City which used to be part of Bacolod mission but has recently been made part of Cebu mission. Plus, I'm now going to be a Sister Training Leader which basically means I go on splits with other sisters and help them become better and help other people more. At least, I think so. Not quite sure how to do this, but I'm sure the Lord will help me out. My companion is also an STL- Sis. Luyong is one of my favorite sisters and  I can't wait to be companions with her. She was also trained by Sis. Yanga in Bayawan, so the common experiences have made us really good friends already.

Family dearest, it’s been an incredible last week in Balamban, but I spent most of my time writing to President Schmutz and so this is not going to work out very well.

So one story, because the other even better one should have another part tonight- that’s the followup of Lolita and her husband Felipe. Thank you so much for your prayers for them!

But this is Chingbee, who is Lolita’s sister in law. She’s also a long lost member. We stopped by Lolita’s to invite her to the baptism of the Elders investigator – another story that I promise to tell you next year! And Chingbee was there, and with a reluctant grimace agreed to come with us. We made quite the parade walking to the chapel, but it was great. When we got to thechapel, some members took our guests under their wings and fed them cassava and pancit, and fellowshipped. Chingbee sat in the corner and sulked and I couldn't figure it out. But I looked over, she looks at me pleading, and then starts crying. Ching Bee went through a lot- two husbands dying, 4 children to take care of, abuse and so much more. But she came to his house. She's actually leaving again today, but we got to talk to her, and I felt a little bit of that saviors on Mount Zion idea. We just have to help each other

I've spent this week thinking a lot about water- we've had an incredibly hot and sticky week, so I have to be conscious of not getting dehydrated. But I was reading in 2 Nephi about God taking away the cup of wrath. How true is that! Sometimes, we sit drinking this cup of sin and doubt and fear, thinking that it's going to fill us, and we can't really stop ourselves. Until he comes and offers a new cup- his living water, or a new covenant in remembrance of his suffering that we at least can remember every week. The sacrament is life changing if we allow it to be. We do it every week, but it is not common place. This is salvation every week, every day in prayer and preparation. 

Loves

April 30, 2014

Family- I mean Pamily,

(This is the funniest part of Visaya for me. Sometimes they use the English word interchangeably, especially if it's latin derived. but you have to say it in a Filipino accent or they can't understand. Like if you want to buy ice water, you can't just say that, you have to say iccce waterrr, with the emphasis on the e. It's lovely. But English with a Filipino accent is sometimes the best mode of communication- if someone's from the city, they don't understand half of what I say in Visaya because I learned it in really old regions. I love life)

Actually, continuing that thought, I love life. I've been struck every day this week with how much I love being a missionary. It's the coolest experience. I get to hike around in the rice fields and beaches and nipa huts of the Philippines or ride tricycles and jeepneys and act like Jesus Christ would want me to act, and see miracles everyday. Nobody here believes that we're not given a salary, and it's my favorite thing to explain my job. Someone yesterday told us that we had our crowns waiting in heaven, and that made sense to her, but it can't even be about that. We are beggars who love to serve our Father. I was reading 2 Nephi 7 this morning and was struck by our inability to redeem ourselves- we're a bunch of worthless coupons and expired gift certificates until we are put into the hands of the designated Master Redeemer, and then suddenly, we're a treasure trove of infinity bills. 

This week has been chock full of miracles. For times sake, here's the sample:

1- Last week, in visiting an investigator for the first time, a woman peeked in the window and says, I"m a member. What?? Okay, join us!! But then she left  and we didn't get a name or anything. This sunday, we were in the neighborhood again, so we wanted to look for her- a little girl comes up to me, says "Are you looking for Aunty Lolita who's Mormon?" UM, YES.

We went to her house, with Nanay Capuyan and we found out that her whole family was taught and almost baptized and she used to work with missionaries, and she's having a hard life, and she misses the church. Last year, her 1.5 year old son died. She couldn't even say that without this look of despair. 

I sometimes forget how lucky we are to have knowledge. We were able to talk to her about the true plan of God, and when I told her that her son was without sin, she lit up through the tears. That's something that I learned in Sunday school in primary- and I have hope. And I internalized that truth in Sibonga with our funeral for Precy. But I forget how many are searching. Pray for Lolita okay?

2- We met someone from Sibonga, right next to the home of our recent convert and progressing investigator- Jeramae is very devoted to her church at home, but she's so open to truth. She has faith in that same plan of God, even though she has very little idea about it. These people will teach me more than I ever teach them.

3- Last night, we taught a member family as part of our Hastening the Work program and I kind of just got things more. We all need each other in this Zion. Also, the strength of the Priesthood is incredible.

Also, on Wednesday, we played tennis! That was my first time holding a racket in 10 months and I convinced my district that this would be a great idea. We went to these beat down tennis courts behind the chruch and nicely borrowed rackets from little children and then they all gathered around to watch, plus another 30 or 40 people, while we played around the world and mostly made fools of ourselves. They were all very willing to go get the ball for us :) The Lord made life for the enjoying. Letting myself laugh has been the secret to missionary work in the Philippines. So little Dodong sitting by the net becomes another laugh in this beautiful place.

I love you all! I can see your infinity bill worth and I'm grateful for the promises of eternity. Eyes of faith!

Sister Tueller

This is Sis. B- assigned in Balamban 2- mostly I just enjoyed the picture and the very strange colliding of worlds

Here's what happens when you try to play tennis in the Philippines

Bitaw

Dear ones,

The time is far spent! Thank you for all the news and every single detail.
I loved hearing about Easter on the ship, and in Oak Hills. I've felt so
full of gratitude for our heritage of faith. The funeral sounded beautiful-
Last week, as I read emails, one of my house mates noticed that I wasn't
normal, asked what was going on, and offered this help: She's with you now.
Grandma and the Spirit have been helping me in heaping spoonfuls this week.

And now for miracles:
First, the biggest miracle is that Christ lives! I've been able to teach
that, and it's true. The doctrine tastes good. More on that later.

We had a baptism this week! Ardgie Dumdum is the 13 year old nephew of the
Branch president who lives with his other uncle, a recent convert. He's
actually been coming to church for 8 months, but his parents wouldn't give
permission. Sis. N and I dedicated some fasting to that, and Ardgie
prayed everyday, and they gave permission last month. But then he needed to
be interviewed by Pres. S because he's so young. That took lots of
waiting, because Pres. is rarely here, and then he wasn't even going
to be able to interview him, but prayers works and lots of jeepney
rides and calling people, we got Ardgie an interview, and had a
surprise baptism. Plus, we hustled and visited all of
our LA families with 8 year olds and got interviews for them and made
sure everyone had the priesthood who needed it, and we had this
wonderful baptism!!

So, the power went out in the middle of me writing that story, so this
is now 2 hours later, we're about to go to our zone activity and
that's the end of that story.

We also had interviews and I was so grateful for someone who knows me and
has seen my progress.

Here's my Easter experience. With Sis. A, we talked to Sis. Lizil, who
didn't seem interested at first, but finally said we could come back the
next day. So, of course, we go back- like Elder Ballard taught us- Follow
up!  Her family was watching TV (This was on Good Friday, so everyone had
work off), and as we came in, everyone left except a few. They weren't very
happy about turning off the TV, but Sis. Lizil insisted. We sat on the
floor and watched the wild dogs come in and out for a while, as they got
themselves situated. I almost felt like we needed to just get this over
with, but I was humbled really fast. We sang, prayed, began teaching, etc.
Sis. Lizil seemed very quiet, but at least nice. She asked us one question-
"Why don't you use the sign of the cross?" This is a super common question-
people have themselves convinced that this and saints are the only
difference between Mormons and Catholics. So I'm used to answering this.
But somehow, I was guided, and answered her question clearly. "Sister, what
do we celebrate today?"

"His death."
"What is the cross a symbol of?"
"His death."
"And what will we celebrate on Sunday?"
"That he lives."

And she just looked at me with a new kind of light in her eyes and said
"Bitaw, no?"- which I can only really explain as "I've never thought of
that, but of course."

I wrote in my journal about that that night, because I felt it, but I
wasn't sure what would happen. However, later, we were working with her
,e,ber neighbor, Sis. Capuyan. She almost couldn't hold in her joy to tell
us. Lizil had been talking to her and she couldn't stop saying- It makes
sense. She understood. Lizil couldn't come up with any other way to
describe it, but she understood. I know she'll do so well, because of
course, our Savior lives.  She's really busy with work, so please pray that
we'll be able to visit her.

I will try to back log next week-but so much happens!! Balamban is a
place of joy and growth. I'm filled with peace and like Nephi, "I know
in whom I have trusted." He lives. He stands with us. Let us choose to
live like Him.

Pinakamaayo ikapadala nako ninyo,

Sister Tueller

The Balamban District

Our lunch at General Conference

The baptism!

Here's Ardgie.

My two mga anak

Love More and Love Better

First, I can't wait to watch conference this weekend. Due to our time difference here, we get everything a week later, but it gives me an extra week to prepare to hear these words, to ask questions, to prepare myself in the Spirit. What did you love from the words of Christ?

Miracles abound in this place. I've been really struck with the miracles that happen when the members are involved. The work is beginning to hasten here in Balamban- we as missionaries are understanding our weakness alone, and slowly but surely, the members are also finding their responsibility. It's a hard thing to teach- but as we pray, the Spirit is working with them. Example: Our branch president is the best, and this week, he finally got it. He's decided that we need someone to work with us everyday. Obviously, he can't force people to help us, but we're understanding.

The Sugabo children came to church! Because we involved members. We got their uncle to go pick them up. He was willing, just waiting for an invitation. We were hoping for an April baptism for Jerico, MariCris, and JeriMae, but we need to make sure they understand. They have very little background in the gospel, because they've been less active for so long. It makes me so grateful for the good primary teachers in my life who helped my learning. But Sis. Cuajao was a primary teacher in her ward at home, so we're doing great. Jerico and MariCris have stopped being shy and can pray on demand, JeriMae's still working on it. The light of the gospel is spreading in them.

I can't remember if I've talked about Bro. Christian. He's the partner of Sis. Cherisa a less active. I think he's actually my age, and Cherisa's a year old than me. They have an adorable daughter with the chubbiest cheeks. Christian's been an investigator for over a year and a half. He comes to church faithfully. He brings his mini Book of Mormon to work and reads during his lunch break. He wants to bless his daughter. The problem is the wedding papers. But we have a deadline of May 8 before other papers expire, and good news in terms of funding help, and I can feel that we're having a wedding this transfer! I'd had a hard time understanding him before this week. He seems to joke about things and not focus- like asking about the price of land in Hawaii after reading about the Atonement, but then have a deep understanding when asked. He finally opened up this week about some of his problems and the ways he's been transformed by the gospel and his family. He's light hearted, because he chooses not to be heavy hearted. Christian understands who his Savior is. That change happened before I ever taught him ,but I'm grateful to see it. That's why we work. In some small ways, I have come to know my Savior and so I invite others to him. Their door is the cutest- it's in the middle of all these little bamboo/other wood houses, and then their door has this huge picture of the Savior's second coming. They're looking forward to it. Pray that we can make this wedding happen!

Sis. Mercy was a tender mercy in my life this week. We were working with Nanay Capuyan- more miracles because she invites everyone to listen to us. But Sis. Mercy was special. She was baptized when she was very young, and has avoided missionaries ever since her mother changed to Seventh Day Adventist. She's been confused, and I can't even begin to describe the trials in her life. Suffice it to say that she was recently diagnosed with brain cancer- she's only 26, and it's the latest in a chain of many problems. Sis. Mercy decided to visit with us in Sis. Capuyan's house, and the Spirit was so present. We shared about Christ's atonement, and she told us she needed to come back to him. I don't have any other response to that except YES! She's got a lot of steps to take, but Sis. Mercy will come to Christ. 

I'm excited for this coming week- we're spending the next four days in meetings- zone training, interviews, and general conference. We won't get as much time to work which is hard, and I worry about our people who need to progress, but I cannot wait to be edified and filled. 

God answers our small prayers. He's uniquely aware of us. We labor diligently. We labor in his way. Slowly, our hearts turn to him, and then we are filled.

I love you all. I'm sorry this is all over the place- I think I'm developing a head cold and my thoughts are flying a little bit. But I know the gospel of Jesus Christ is perfect and true. I'm so far from perfect, but somehow, he makes me so much more. I'd never understand about the Lamanites receiving the Holy Ghost, and the baptism of fire and not even knowing it, but this week, in reflecting on who I'm becoming, on who Sis. Tueller is now, I think I saw that a little bit. We may not even realize, but as we work, the Master Carver is making something of us. I'm glad to be able to fill my role, my branch on his perfect vine.

More power coming your way,

Sister Tueller

Nindot

Katawo nga gihigugma nako,

Life is good. The Lord is good. Prayer is great. Balamban is the best! 

We're enjoying life here a lot. Sis. C is on fire! To quote the district, she came pre-trained! Obviously, she's better than I am at the language, so I do my best to teach doctrine, and I do know people are feeling the spirit, and then Sis. C explains it in the way that makes sense to them. I feel like it's this extra step that gets things into their hearts, not just unto their hearts. She's also one of those really fun, talented, good at everything, life of the party kind of people. I'm grateful and I get to learn.

Also, she's an amazing cook. I haven't really had Filipino food immersion yet- but this girl eats rice everyday now! And dried fish heads and salted egg and adobo and sayote and mongoes and things I don't know names of, but I'll learn to cook.

This week has been full of miracles! 

Yesterday, Sis. C ended up with a migraine (even for Filipinos, the heat of working takes some adjusting) and so we had to come home for a little bit. I was so impressed because as soon as she could, she sprang up and we went out to work. We had to change some plans, and we ended up at a less active who we hadn't visited in 2 or 3 months- not really progressing, having a hard time with having enough faith. Dear Sis. Calatrava looked so hunched over and burdened by her load. She was just looking down. But we sat down on the benches, and with all sorts of loud motorcycles and sikads driving by, we taught her. It was one of those times that the words simply came, not from me because I'm good at this, because I have so much left to learn, but because Heavenly Father loves his children. We talked about bearing our burdens, and Sis. Calatrava really understood. Her whole countenance got really light, and finally by the end, she cracked a little bit of a smile. The problems of looking for dinner, and caring for her disabled son, and worrying about her daughter are still there, but she could smile. Her prayer was so sincere. The best part for me though, was watching Sis. C testify of the strength we can get to do things that are hard. She said it, and then paused, and then said it again, because she felt it- even though the first week of a mission is hard, she can do it. We're so lucky as missionaries, because usually we learn just as much as the people we teach.

On Sunday night, no one seemed to be in their homes, and I didn't quite know where to go (I've noticed that this is usually when my best stories happen :)) But we walked out of this little neighborhood and a nice Nanay called us over. Turns out, she was the former investigator we were looking for, who'd just gotten back from her brother's funeral. He's a stake president on another island, and she had been filled with the spirit. She has lots of questions and she sees the strength of the family that is in the church. She's not sure if she can make the journey into the church, but I know we can do anything! We're going to keep praying for Sis. Ymelda.

We were teaching Ardgie- the 13 year old who'll be baptized as soon as we get an interview with Pres. Schmutz. We asked him to describe how he feels when he prays. He thought about it for a long time and couldn't quite come up with something. His 8 year old cousin Samuel who was raised in the church could come up with things, like - I feel light, and I feel love, but Ardgie couldn't quite articulate it. We talked about that a little, and eventually he found his answer. 

When I pray, I feel nindot. 

Nindot is the jack of all trades word- it means cool, neat, nice, beautiful- anything positive. I say that lots of things are nindot, because I love to have a positive attitude. Sis. C actually uses English words to be more expressive- so everything is Amazing and Enticing and So interesting! But family, prayer is nindot. It's nindot kaayo.

Also, we walked in the jungle and a woman calls out :"We like you. Come!" So we taught them a lesson. Not very common, but hey, someone likes us!

I hope your week is also nindot, because I love you all very much. You are blessings in my life, and I couldn't be more grateful.

Keep doing good things, keep trying harder tomorrow.

( I've been just making up all of these closing lines- people don't actually write letters in Visaya, or they finish in English, but I asked Sis. C what's a normal Filipino sign off, and this was her answer- "It means like, you're giving them power in their lives"- so take some power today everyone!)

God bless and more power,

Sister Tueller